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Superbowl Sunday.  Afternoon.  Conversation:

him:  I have to pick up some pop for the superbowl party later.

me:  We’re going to a superbowl party?

him:  Yea, I told you that.

me:  What?  I’m not so sure about that. 

him:  I did.  You don’t remember.

me:  No, I wasn’t listening.  Well, I didn’t know that was today.  What’s the date today?

him:  It’s February 1st.

me:  WHAT?  SONOFA  #$%^!   That means my $10 off Gordmans coupon expired.   DANGIT!!!!!

him: So I have to get pop.

me:  Well, what are my chances of getting out of going cus I have alot of crap to do?

him:  About as good as my chances of getting a back rub tonight.

me:  But what if I’m suuuuper tired? 

him:   ….

me:  Well that’s some b.s. right there.  You know how I get sick when I’m sleep deprived.

him:  Well good thing you work from HOME.  Sleep in.   Clearly, you need to get out of the house, you didn’t know what day it was. 

[cut to three hours later at the Superbowl party……..]

Steelers Cardinals Football

 me:  so who’s playing anyway?

him:   Steelers and the Cardinals.

me:  Ok, well, I hate yellow so on principle I have to hope the red team wins.

him:  Good, we want the red team to win.

me:  and have you ever smelt pittsburg?  seriously. what a crap hole.

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Listen.  I don’t give a crap about sports, unless someone is injuring themselves.  Heretofore, I don’t give a crap about the Olympics.  Maybe it’s because I’m ridiculously unsporty and non-competitive, I’m not entirely sure.  And maybe my unsportyness boils down to the fact that I have had to avoid activities that involve things flying at my head, due to the hole that was left in the side of my skull from a car accident when I was 16.  Could be.  

But who’s to know?

However, I must hand it to whomever is in charge of those heartwarming personal stories and inspirational Olympic commercials that leave you feeling proud to be an American But now follows the ever so deep soul-searching question: does this make the Olympics worth watching?  And that answer, my friends, is absolutely not.

 

In the way of the Olympics, the word on the street is that this happens to be an extra special year, considering China has stopped killing babies for a few weeks so they can host the world.  But given my rather frank disdain for all things oriental [with China receiving the brunt of my cynicism], this shatters any glimmer of hope that I may have watched them for even one second. 


So I say all that to say-  that this is probably, most likely not the place you want to come, to find anything Olympic-ish.  Sorry!

 

 

  

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